Episode 17: Runners and Body Image with Amber Harris, Run and Strength Coach
Running is more than just a form of exercise; it's a catalyst for personal transformation. In a heartfelt episode of the Sturdy Girl podcast, we're introduced to Amber, an expert run and strength coach, whose journey into running began with a reluctant 5k race. The discussion that ensues is not just about the physicality of running but its profound impact on mental health, self-esteem, and body image.
Amber shares her story, which echoes the experiences of many: the initial resistance to running, the embracing of it as a crucial mental health tool, and the eventual identity shift as running becomes a source of empowerment. Her dual role as a coach and a mother offers rich insights into how fitness not only reshapes our own lives but also influences the younger generation. This influence is critical as it brings to light the societal pressures surrounding beauty standards, body image, and the struggle many face in finding a sense of self-acceptance.
Running, Amber explains, has been a constant companion through life's ebb and flow, including the challenges brought on by perimenopause and the global pandemic. These narratives underscore the resilience that running fosters, not only in body but in spirit. It's about the recognition of our bodies' capabilities and the celebration of strength over appearance.
But Amber's story isn't just about overcoming challenges; it's also about the joy and fulfillment that running can bring. From powering through treadmill marathons while binge-watching "This Is Us" to the mental lift that comes with a good playlist, these are the moments that punctuate the journey with happiness and self-appreciation.
The episode takes a turn to discuss coaching with compassion. Amber stresses the importance of realistic goals and sustainable practices. She challenges the "no days off" mentality and advocates for a balanced approach to fitness. The conversation touches on the art of starting with a simple 10-minute rule, allowing individuals the freedom to continue or stop, often leading them to achieve more than they initially thought possible.
As the episode nears its end, Amber and the host delve into the common pitfalls of burnout and overcommitment in running. A personal story of burnout leads to a six-month hiatus, illustrating the need to listen to one's body and the danger of tying one's identity too closely to a single pursuit. They discuss the 80/20 rule for training and the need for mental toughness without overtraining.
In the final chapter, the focus shifts to building habits and resilience in running. The advice given is practical and relatable, like setting achievable goals and maintaining a baseline of non-negotiable activities. Personal anecdotes about adapting to injuries and the concept of temptation bundling provide listeners with tangible strategies for maintaining their fitness journey, whether they are seasoned marathoners or just starting out.
To conclude, the Sturdy Girl podcast episode with Coach Amber offers a comprehensive look at how running can serve as a powerful tool for empowerment, self-care, and personal growth. It is a reminder that the journey is as much about mental resilience as it is about physical endurance, and that every step taken is a step toward a more confident and fulfilled self.
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Jess: 0:01
Hello, friends, and welcome to Sturdy Girl, a podcast focused on strength, not size, where you'll hear conversations around healthy body image, cultivating confidence and being a resilient human in both body and mind. Sturdy Girl is the podcast where we shift the focus away from your appearance and on to living the big, rad life you deserve. Hello, my Sturdy friends, and welcome back to another episode of Sturdy Girl. Today I have my longtime Instagram friend, Amber. Here we're going to talk body image, running, confidence, probably some other things and some random tangents, but thanks for being here. Of course, thank you for having me, Jeff. This is going to be fun. I wanted to give a little introduction, I guess calling you my longtime Instagram friend, but also tell me a little bit about you. What do you do? How long have you been running?
Amber: 0:52
I am a run and strength coach. I have been running I guess almost 20 years. I trained for a 5k with my bestie, who's also named Jess, in 2005 for something to do and look forward to, and after that race I swore I was never going to run farther than that because I was so stupid. Why would anyone do that? Obviously I have. I run a 50k, a few marathon, 20 halves. I am a wife and a mom. I have two teenagers which is wild and I work for myself, so I have clients that I train one-on-one running and strength training and then I do some corporate fitness where I teach classes at a business.
Jess: 1:30
That's awesome. I didn't realize that you've been running 20 years and also you got talked into a 5k. You probably crossed the finish line and you're like F this I've never run again, yeah it's like why, and then how much longer till you signed up for another race.
Amber: 1:43
I would probably say it was honestly a couple years Okay, because then I had yeah, I would run but I wasn't racing. Okay, and then I had my kids and decided to be a stay-at-home mom. So running was then became my me time, even if I was pushing my daughter or both of them when my son came along, it was still my time for me and it was just nice to have that separation of something that I could do for myself. That's awesome.
Jess: 2:08
And then, when did you start running coaching and or strength coaching?
Amber: 2:11
Well, I started coaching friends. First, right, I got my certification my RRCA certification in 2012, I think Okay. And then strength coaching I got my personal training certification a couple years after that, I think I decided that if I was going to go back to working once, my kids were of an age where I had a few hours on my day, that I wanted to go and do something that mattered, and running and strength training made such a difference in my life that I wanted to be able to help someone else find that women, especially because I've been strength training. I don't know. I think I started lifting when I was like 12 or 13. That's awesome, like off and on right, like I didn't do a lot of it in college.
Jess: 2:48
Fair Understanding kind of the benefits it can have beyond just physical health. Yeah, I also got into running and run coaching after a friend convinced me to sign up for a race, so I love that. That's how you got into it too. I got talked into a half marathon, though. My friend posted on Facebook and was like I signed up for a half. I'm freaking out, who's going to train with me? That sounds terrible. And it was back when I know. It was back when, like, people just posted random statuses on Facebook, you know, and I was like, hmm, I can probably run a half. That sounds absolutely awful, but maybe I could do it. So I messaged back and I'm like sure I'll do it with you. And it was like a three and a half month ramp up from like nothing to half marathon. And I was the same way. It was a December half marathon and it was like 35 degrees and raining and I'm like I'm never running again. This was the dumbest idea of my life. But in the process we'd like started a running blog called we run for cupcakes and we had so much fun writing these blogs that I finished that race. And I was a week later and I was like, okay, what race am I doing next? A week later, yeah, it was a week later. It was like, by the time, the soreness goes away from, like running an untrained race and then from there we're in a half that following spring and my first full marathon, the fall of that year, it just escalated real quick.
Amber: 4:09
Like you just weren't full, full throttle.
Jess: 4:11
But same with you where you're like okay, I started coaching friends. I was like friends, family, friends of friends, and then I was like, hmm, probably get certified. Yeah, probably get certified if I'm going to coach these people. Yeah, and the rest is history. Starting out with that love of movement and seeing how much it helps For me. It was like that mental health piece too yeah, 100%.
Amber: 4:32
It was so bad, like when my kids are a little, sometimes they still do it to me, and my husband too, but like if I was like grumpy extra, like nappy or whatever, they'd be like mom, I think you need to go for a run. Yeah, they caught on that. That is definitely like a mental help for me is to like get out and move my body in that way.
Jess: 4:50
I'm just trying not to like crack up laughing on my microphone over here, but like same to the point, like Blake will come and hand me my shoes and so you won't even say anything. And it's not like, hey, you're being a jerk or you're being grumpy, it's like you just need to do this. I think a run might be a good idea, you know, or a lift at this point, like knowing how much it's going to benefit. And in fact, when we first started dating one of my best friends, she told my husband she's like, if Jess is ever grouchy, she needs one of three things she needs some kind of workout, whether that's a run or a lift. She needs food or she needs sleep or a combination. It is up to you to figure that out, but I can guarantee you it's one or a combination of those three. Blake will tell you to this day it is not steered him wrong. Yeah, that's fair. So he started always having snacks in like the center console of his car. Here you go. You're being grumpy.
Amber: 5:41
My husband makes, when I make the food in my glove box.
Jess: 5:43
That's smart, though, and especially with all of your long distance running. Yeah, how many times you get back to car and you're like all right, what's in the glove box?
Amber: 5:50
Yes, I'm so hungry. Yeah, I need something now. Yes, exactly, give me the snacks.
Jess: 5:55
Okay. So what is on your race schedule? Because you ran a 50 K in the fall?
Amber: 6:02
No, it was in. I guess, it was later in that year that I trained for the 50 K, because I remember it being cold like into 2021. Okay, I think it was in March of 2021, because I remember just like being cold, there were like icicles on my eyelashes, like that was how training went. But also we were four people in a tiny house at the time, like my husband was trying to work, the kids were going to school, and then I was just sitting there because, you know, my business was like had imploded. Yeah, because the gym closed, right, and so it's like I need to do something. So that sounded like something smart to do. Challenge your body in your brain. I love it. I'm not showing you to play with 50k. It was. It's like rail to trails. Okay, yeah, that was relatively flat. If I'm going to do a 50k, I'm not going to do a technical course. That's just what I know about myself. That's fair. I can do shorter races on technical courses. But, okay, what's on deck for 2024? I don't know, I might be doing a 50k in April, but we'll see. I raised to you guys this summer. There's some for 그럼. We're making a 30 lleg чего test right now. We're almost there. Yeah, so I'm and this is one of the first test I tried to do. I could just keep thinking about it and go with it. You know, 1 minute to the speed 10, 5 minutes, right? Okay, let's start with the center field. Yep, like that, yeah.
Jess: 7:28
So I'm decision구 and then freezes. That's where you're at. Yeah, how do you keep yourself entertained on the treadmill?
Amber: 7:36
So what I like to do on the treadmill is I'll give myself a show that I can watch, but only when I'm on the treadmill. So that kind of motivates me, like if I want to see what happens, hopefully it's a good show, if I want to see what's happening next in the next episode or whatever, then I have to go down there and get on the treadmill.
Jess: 7:51
I love it. That's kind of what I've been doing too.
Amber: 7:54
Yep, I was watching. Last week or earlier this week I was watching the Kevin Hart special. I do not recommend that, though, because I almost fell off the treadmills from laughing.
Jess: 8:03
I did it. I didn't see my run. That's I was going to say right, you're like bracing your arm rails on your treadmill, yeah, like keeping yourself Exactly what's happening.
Amber: 8:11
I'm trying not to die.
Jess: 8:13
I'm trying to remember it was like 2017. We started having pretty bad fires here and I was relegated to training for a marathon on a treadmill and I watched all of this Is Us. Wow, I'm not all of them, but like how much does that show make you cry and at the time we were like in our condo and we had our treadmill on the loft and I would be like sobbing while I'm still running and then like my husband would come upstairs and he's like jazz, are you okay? Like what happened. I'm like this show and I'm pushing, yeah, but hey, you know what the distraction piece of being on the treadmill like if it makes a time slot it's worth it, Whatever it takes to get through it right. I'll tell you, though, if the show's not doing it, I will bust out early 2000s pop or rock and like the go to playlist of just obnoxious music and then just go out for the last 10 minutes yeah.
Amber: 9:10
Yeah, that's why I'm on long run If I remember myself like outside 90s, early 2000s. Hip hop and R&B yes, I love. It Always gets me through.
Jess: 9:20
Okay, so, talking a little bit on the lines of Sturdy Girl and just delving into a little bit about maybe like body image or confidence or resilience, do you feel like running has helped you in any way with like your relationship with yourself or with your body over the years? And we were talking a little bit about that mental health piece.
Amber: 9:39
Right, 100%. I think when I have those tough days, I just reflect on, like, what my body has been able to do, regardless of what size it's been. I mean, you know COVID was hard gained some weight. Paramount of pause is here, so that's fun, not knowing your body, yeah, and so I try when I get in that headspace to focus on that, like what my body is capable of, all the miles that it's carried me through, all the races, how much I can lift or you know, I take pride in my I see, you're like four times speed lifts on Instagram, you know? yeah, I'm like did you make them so fast? Yeah, and then also for me as a mom, like that also helps me, especially for like the running. When the running gets hard, I tap into that. Like you've had kids, you can finish this half marathon or you can finish this marathon or whatever. That's crazy. Like I grew up kind of similar to you, I had two sisters. They're both tiny in like stature and they're thin. So I'm the tallest and I have the biggest body, not to say that I'm like. I'm like straight-sized, you know, and my mom was very thin too when I was growing up, so like, even though no one, my mom never made me feel a certain way about my body or anything like that I don't even think my sisters did really, but it was still like. Because when we realized message right this is the messaging white, blonde, blue and tiny. This is the american standard. You, ma'am, are none of those things, and my mom actually is. She's white, blue eyed, so that was a whole other thing.
Jess: 11:08
It's like well why didn't I get any of that my whole mind? How do you feel like that impacted, like growing up and like combating those messages?
Amber: 11:16
I mean, it was hard.
Jess: 11:17
I played sports, I played basketball, volleyball, so that definitely helped still so, like the physical movement piece, like just you know, without being able to, but like focusing on the things that you, your body, can do your body couldn't do things you asked yeah, and when you're playing sports for the most part, right, we could get into a whole discussion of like a typical runner's body and like that whole thing, right. I feel like in high school and those pieces of playing sports, the way your body looks or the size of your body isn't necessarily something that ends up being at the forefront right, it didn't matter as much anyways. Yeah, they're working on skills based practice instead of that.
Amber: 11:53
Yes, in our high school we had I think it was the first year they had it, but our assistant basketball coach started a women's weightlifting class. So that was a lot of fun and really empowering to like be able to lift in the weight room after school, but it just be all females so we didn't have to take it in with the guys and all the things. Yeah, the role of being their comments, the weird look I mean you know, high school is high school, but I found that to be very empowering and my daughter just paints in something like that too at her school that's awesome.
Jess: 12:26
I was going to ask any insights on being a mom and navigating that piece of I'm going to say having a daughter. So we talk more to women on starting girl but like instilling the messaging of you're so much more than a body and talking about those pieces of working on that confidence, because those teen years are so fraught with emotion and just I can't imagine navigating that it's hard.
Amber: 12:48
I have to say for myself like I always was aware of what I said and I don't think I've ever said anything negative about my body in front of my daughter and I was very conscious of that and wanted to be sure that I didn't do that, and I think it's been good. I don't hear her say at least to me or in my ear shot right, she's strong, she's been lifting since, like when I taught classes at the Y and she was old enough to come at like nine years old, she would come and take my classes. So she's always been in that environment, yeah, and I just always try to preach. You know, like it's not about what your body looks like, but what it can do and how beneficial movement is for your mental health as well as your physical health. Absolutely, so I think I've been a decent job. I don't know. I have some any crazy fallout, so we'll keep rolling right, but I feel like that's all parenting right, like you try to leave your kids better than what you felt it was for you. Yeah, absolutely, it's all you can do.
Jess: 13:43
I don't know if I've succeeded, but I'm trying. Cool to see both of your kids playing sports, enjoying movement on a competitive level like that's really rad, and for them to have seen the example of you running and strength training in teaching classes about the importance of movement through their whole lives yes, that's really awesome do you feel like the strength training and or running component helped at all as far as, like I'm gonna say, resilience, but like that strength piece, that mental strength piece especially I was just thinking about, like you're talking about, you did your first 5k, you there were a couple years in between and then you kind of came back to it. You started having kids. In that period of time that running was like your me time. Did that help with mental health and that resilience piece of returning to the challenges of being a new mom or the challenges in life, like was there any kind of benefit in that realm?
Amber: 14:31
100%. I tried to do my first half marathon. I was training and found out I was pregnant with my daughter. My mother, godlove her was always calling me like are you sure you should be doing this? Like are you sure this is okay for the baby? So eventually I was just like I'm just gonna stop. Does this go back to our conversation about choosing your battles? Yes, 100%, because you know she was coming from a good place and it was like all she knew is the old science that was like you should not get your heart rate above whatever they say to pregnant one we used to say to pregnant and so I stopped and then after I had Ava, obviously I kept running and it did help because, like, I went from working in an office 50 to 60 hours a week to being home with this tiny little person. My husband travels a lot for work, so a lot of times it was just the two of us and that was an adjustment. So running it got me out of the house and you know we would go to like parks and so I would run and then let her play. So it was kind of a thing that we did together. So I think it helped us bond and then also it was just a place where it's like I can get 30 minutes mentally I'll feel better and be a better mother to her. And then when I had my son, I decided, okay, I'm done having kids, because I got one of each and I didn't want any more kids and I had hands and I was a parent, right exactly. And so that's when I started training for my first. I think I ran my first half, like he was like six months old, seven months old. Yeah, it's probably stupid in hindsight. I probably should have not went right back to running as things I did, but I did it with my best friend Jeff and another best friend from college, or two different best friends from college, and we did the half together. And when I say together, they were like, please leave me, you just just go, we'll see it's just together.
Jess: 16:13
And then there's like running. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, they're like, please go. I'm like, okay, I'm running a half in April with a couple of friends and we're like, are we running together? And I was like, probably not no offense, but we can all do the race and we'll see each other at the finish line and go eat brunch afterwards, right, probably?
Amber: 16:33
be solo. What happens that way sometimes?
Jess: 16:35
okay, I want to ask and I was sitting here trying to formulate like how I wanted to ask about being a run coach and your experience with helping people build their confidence in running, but I was trying to think of how we wanted to like word that question, since I also coach runners and so I have all kinds of thoughts on this but just the piece of like. Someone comes to you and says, amber, I want to run a half marathon. I am scared shitless, but it's a goal of mine that I have set like my big giant goal for 2024 is to run a half. Where do I start? And so you get this piece of like. I'm going to say insecurity, but someone hasn't built a skill in running or built that mental resilience piece that is equally as important as the physical training of a half. Tell me about the experience of getting to help cultivate that.
Amber: 17:15
For me, coaching whatever it is, I always coach from a place of grace, right, like we have a plan. But also you need to be kind to yourself and give yourself grace, because a coach should not expect like 100% adherence, right? That's just not realistic. So I come from give yourself some grace. I like to use the 10 minute rule, especially with new people. Give yourself 10 minutes, go out there for 10 minutes or get on the treadmill for 10 minutes. If you're still not feeling it, then give yourself permission to stop. It just wasn't a good day for you, but most of the time, but you're going to finish whatever you set up For the time you're out there.
Jess: 17:48
Yeah, given yourself the option to quit. I think that's really important. Yeah, for no matter if you've been doing it for a short time or a long time. Yeah, times when I have to convince myself okay, all you need to do is like turn on the treadmill, okay, you're moving, you're going to start running. Give it five minutes. Okay, give it 10. I kind of talk myself into it and then I tell myself all right, it's been 10 minutes. Do you want to quit? You can quit. And just giving yourself the option to quit, I'm going to say the illusion of choice, because nine times out of 10, you're like oh, I'm here.
Amber: 18:17
I'm going to keep going, yeah.
Jess: 18:20
It helps you to feel more empowered in the decision that you're making to continue it, so I think that's awesome.
Amber: 18:25
I use it on myself too. All right, I'm going to go here, I'm going to run 10 minutes and if I don't feel like it, I'm going to turn around and I'm going to walk myself back. I can't think I can think of very few times where it was just actually like, yeah, you don't need to be out here, like bad sleep or I hadn't eaten enough or whatever the case may be. But usually I'm going to finish the run or the lift or whatever it is. But for people that are just starting out, I like to focus a lot on the why right? Why are you doing this race or whatever it is? Because that's what we have to tap back into when it gets hard. Why are we doing this? Because you don't have to. That's the thing. You don't have to do this. Either one of us have to be here doing this. So this was you, right, like you had your reason, and so at some point you're going to have to learn to tap into that, because I can't do that for you, right? When it gets hard, what are you going to do?
Jess: 19:11
And that's not even new runners. I think about that with like marathoners that I coach. It's that upper mileage. When you're like I'm 20 miles in, I'm 21 miles in, what the heck am I doing out here? This hurts. I'm tired, I'm hungry. I don't want to eat anymore goo gels. I hate this. I don't ever want to run again. And if you have a strong why it's going to keep you going, even if something as simple as like I ran my first marathon because I was curious if I could do it. And I was like can I do this? Purely curiosity was my why I was like well, I ran a half. I ran a second half. This marathon said it's pretty hard, but I'm pretty tough. At least I think I am. So let's see how that goes. Why would I? And I was like why would I quit that? No, then that's the other thing I think too. I think about why is like people will get hung up on that, like, well, my why isn't big enough, it's not profound enough, it doesn't have to be like, it just has to be personally meaningful to you, exactly On why you continue. And I will tell you, changing your body is not a strong enough way.
Amber: 20:07
No, it's not a strong enough way.
Jess: 20:09
I'll say I don't know what conversations you've had with clients about that, but it's like something comes to me and wants to run a race to lose weight. I won't coach them and maybe we have the conversation that explore other reasons why. But most of the time I'll say I'll say no, yeah, I'm not the coach for you. No, because, first of all, long distance running it's not, that's not the weight loss secret, you know right. So that's not going to keep you going when, when it gets hard.
Amber: 20:32
Exactly, Even in the weight room, like the same thing. It's like well, I want to lose weight, but what else? There's got to be another reason. It can't just be for that.
Jess: 20:40
Yeah, and usually there is like, if you have that conversation with someone and they say they want to lose weight, well, I want to lose weight because I want to feel like I have more energy.
Amber: 20:47
I want to feel strong. I feel like you have.
Jess: 20:48
Yeah, why do you? Why is that important to you? Well, I have kids and they are really active and I want to be able to keep up with them, and I want to be able to keep up with them my whole life, instead of not being able to get up and down off the floor comfortably or be able to jump on the trampoline or chase them around or whatever it is. And so then you uncover that it's not about the weight loss, it's what's underneath.
Amber: 21:09
What's happened to that?
Jess: 21:10
Yeah, right, and then have that conversation right, yes, 100%. But I like the fact that you coach from a place of grace because I feel like the messaging, especially in the like run coaching world and it has shifted some. I mean, you've been coaching long enough that you probably worked through that of just the like, grind hard, no days off. Let's train like a pro runner who runs six or seven days a week because that's how we get faster and it's just the push hard. Everyone's running in kind of that middle zone moderate effort and not getting any faster, getting better, or they're burning out or those things.
Amber: 21:40
So just saying or they're getting injured, yeah, I've seen so many coaches that are just like mileage was king and I'm just like that's why your athletes are always injured. When is the break? When is the cutback? Why is every run a workout?
Jess: 21:52
Why aren't we coaching in seasons like any other sport?
Amber: 21:56
You know, and I've been there like as a client, and you know just as like coaching myself, pushing, and I'm like to run six days a week and why never miss a Monday? I was that person for a while. Same, absolutely Of course also, I taught a spin class on Monday morning, so I wasn't going to miss a Monday because I had to teach a spin class.
Jess: 22:13
Have you ever heard of Hanson's marathon method? Yes, okay, I did that for three marathon cycles. Wow, back to back. For the listeners who don't know what Hanson's marathon method is, the whole premise is to be able to learn to run on tired legs. So you run six days a week, you have one rest day, but your sixth day of running is a long speed workout. So it's like a combination of half mile and mile tempos with shorter, one to two minute speed efforts. It is a lot, and I had multiple friends at the time who had Boston qualified using Hanson's marathon method. So I was like, all right, I'm a believer, I see these friends doing this and I ended up completely burning myself out. I ended up with bronchitis and I ran Marine Corps marathon with bronchitis and still completed it because that was my mentality at the time Still showed up to the race and then was like I swore up and down I would never run again and I took six months off after that. I'm glad you took work. You needed it, like my body and brain wouldn't let me. It was the weirdest form of burnout that I've ever experienced in my life. I would lace up my shoes to go for a run, and I'd get outside and I'd start crying because I was like this is hard, I don't like it, I don't want to do it. And it was that piece of going back to like giving yourself grace. I was like this isn't the season. This is not the season, it's not worth it.
Amber: 23:31
I mean, you know, like no, not winning races. I mean, I'm not feeling for myself Like I'm not winning races. I'm not placing, I'm just the middle of the pack.
Jess: 23:39
Did it for enjoyment for a long time and it had shifted away from that because it was all about like Boston qualifying. To me it was that like going back to giving yourself grace of what season you're in and I'm trying to even think like what got me back into running. But one of the hardest parts, I think, stepping away from that much running and I don't know if you can identify with this at all was my identity was so tied up in running and being a runner and being a run coach and chasing this Boston qualifying dream and posting everyone of my runs online and on Strava and everything that went with that. It was such a hard shift to then realize like my identity exists outside of being a runner. Maybe I strength trained to, like I'm not really like, I don't really like, that's not a thing. I'm not a lifter, I'm a runner. Well, but I haven't run in six months. So does that still make me a runner? And trying to detach from that piece. And that, I think, was kind of the catalyst for me of doing this self work, of being a person beyond like what I do or the things that I do productively In my life.
Amber: 24:45
Well, and that's hard in this industry too, because, like when I first started, was the era of like your body is your business card right?
Jess: 24:51
I mean, it's still like that in some circles though. Yeah, it is. I just we've curated our, I think, online.
Amber: 24:57
Yeah, that's true, yeah, so I don't see that anymore. But like, no, it's not my body, is not my business card, because I could be buff and tough and not have any knowledge whatsoever. But I'm going to tell you this plan because you want to look like I look, so I'm going to take advantage of that. I'm going to sell you my six pack Exactly, and it's like my body doesn't know anything about my education, my certifications, what kind of a person I am, I don't know, but I used to believe that I almost ran myself into the ground.
Jess: 25:29
Trying to keep up with it. Yeah yeah, so great. But going back to that piece of like having that runner give themselves grace, or showing up there they're really connecting with their why are there are other things that you would give as advice for building that, that resilience I mean.
Amber: 25:47
I mean like sometimes in classes and so much is running. But I think it also applies when people are like this is really hard and I'm like, well, you didn't come here for easy. Like no one chooses to be a runner because it's going to be easy. Running is not easy. I don't feel like it ever gets easy. You just get better at it, Right, yeah, when I have people say that in class, I just laugh at them like you didn't come here for easy. Like if you wanted it to be easy, you wouldn't have showed up in my class.
Jess: 26:09
You've gone to like the restorative yoga flow.
Amber: 26:11
Right, or you would have came here by yourself and did like five minutes of something and then you would have went back to your desk or whatever. It's going to be hard, just like life. I mean. To me, running is an analogy for life, like what are you going to do when it gets hard? Do you quit, do you, or do you keep pushing?
Jess: 26:27
It's knowing when to quit and when to push. Yes, yeah. And that's not to say like, oh my gosh, you are starting the injury push through, like. It's the point of like running is hard. If you've run at all, you know how hard it is to go from like D trained and training all of those body systems to get on board to running a half, to running a full, to running altruist, to whatever it is, to people who do like obstacle course races, which is below my mind. It's hard and it's looking at that like mental resilience piece of it how do you continue to show up. It's building the skill of exposing yourself to. I think the research calls it like a just manageable challenge. And so that's where, like talking to you as a run coach, knowing how to program people to progress, is you're exposing them continually to that just manageable challenge where, whether it's like increasing volume or distance or speed or those pieces are learning to run at a steady state. It's knowing how to progress, that to expose people to it.
Amber: 27:22
And I'm a big believer of like the 80 20 rule, especially when it comes to running. Like most of your rounds should be easy. You know easy being relative, right, yes.
Jess: 27:31
Exactly Holding up my 80, 20 running book. Yeah, sam.
Amber: 27:36
Just running ourselves into the ground, like for what. I actually had a coaching call with a client this morning. She's run. I can't even tell you how many marathon she's doing 50 states. So she does a few a year. But like we were talking and she hasn't run in like probably a month, she's like I can't get back into my, my habits, and like I'm beating myself up and I'm like why are you beating yourself up? So you literally ran for marathons. You took a month off. It's okay, your body and brain. That's the statement. So like here's what we're going to do.
Jess: 28:03
We're going to throw a few 20 minute runs in here and then get your long run in, because that's the other, that's one piece of it too is like when I wasn't running for those six months I was still like going for walks, going for hikes. I started biking, having other forms of movement, just trying those other things that aren't running and leaving it totally unstructured. But it's such a hard thing. I feel like running attracts more type A personality and more of those like if it's on the schedule, I'm getting it done.
Amber: 28:31
People please perfectionists.
Jess: 28:32
Yeah, yeah, and that's really yummy. Same recovering perfectionists, and it's so hard to let go of that sometimes and be in that season of like, okay, what does my body need? Like clearly there's a lot of resistance here to this movement. What is something that I might enjoy? How do I show up in? A way that honors my body's need for movement, my brain's need for movement, but it's not something that I am completely dreading. Right that I don't feel like doing Kind of, especially with your client, like making the goal to run in all 50 states, race in all 50 states and then be like, ah, I just ran four marathons, but like why don't I want to run Right?
Amber: 29:09
And like we get in the shame cycle, like you shame yourself because you're not doing the run and then you don't do the run because you're shaming yourself because you didn't do the run or the workout or the nutrition or whatever it is Like you have to get out of that. So it happened. Let's move, let's start again. Here's the starting line. We just move it.
Jess: 29:26
What's the movement that you enjoy? That's what's really important. Yep, I was just thinking of our confidence is just the building, confidence in something, the skill in something. So, talking about running, I'm trying to remember where I was reading it, but it was talking about creating habits in your life and whether those habits are like improving your running, improving your lifting. If it's creating the habits, or in drinking more water or eating more fruits and vegetables, or whatever that they were like, don't create the habit as if you're showing up on your best day. Create habits and routines that you can do even on your worst days, like what are the things you can follow through one on the shittiest of days? And that's what's going to set yourself up for growth and being able to say okay, here's my baseline, what are my non-negotiables, and then how can I build on that? And I just thought it was really interesting because we do like for me, when I was sitting down and thinking about what do I want for 2024?, what are my goals? Like, signed up for this half with my friends, we're actually we're running the Maui half marathon in April, so we're making like a long girls weekend, which I'm really excited about, but it was like, okay, what, we have this school to run a half. Obviously I need to run. I need to figure out my run plan. I need to start experimenting with like what shorts I can run in. So I've run in shorts and ages and it's going to probably be warm over there when we run and like bringing that old suggestions and then just being like, okay, when I'm tired, when I'm working long days, how am I still able to show up? And, honestly, sometimes those days are shorty little runs where it is that point of getting on the treadmill and being like, what can we do today? How can we show up? And then building from that. But that's just my tangent. Sorry, I was just thinking about that piece of this like seasons approach of just how to show up and building like out of that's I guess, my point being like building that confidence, building that skill and that almost self trust of being able to show up and then trusting yourself enough. So when you have those days, you have those weeks or those that actual like full season of I'm not showing up how I normally do, you trust yourself enough to know like there's something else going on here. I'm freaking, burnt out from running endlessly, or for me it was powerlifting. I hurt my shoulder and I've had to rehab that and just kind of modify volume there for the first half of fall last year. Like I had no desire to run so just started getting on the bike. It sounded fun doing Peloton class. It sounded great. It sounded great to get on the bike and do hills and read a book at the same time. That's what I did. Like it's talent. Well, I mean, it was more like you know we're talking about watching Netflix on the treadmill and that piece of distraction. That was how I'd be. Like I really want to finish this book tonight. Well, I'm going to go on the bike and I can finish the book. You know, like how those what do they call it? Temptation bundling? So I like bring together the desire to read my book for movement that I want to and know I need to get in, and like pair them together, I do that a lot.
Amber: 32:09
It's fun, I think, for new people, also stressing that walking does not make you a runner, like when you take walking breaks during running.
Jess: 32:17
Yeah, oh, absolutely.
Amber: 32:19
Because I can think back to like when I became a runner, there was no way I could walk during a run.
Jess: 32:23
Yeah because then you didn't get old. I was the same way, like I remember, I'm gonna say curating my runs for when I'd like post the watch shot on social so that it would like be a faster pace, because I wouldn't put like I'd stop my watch when I'd walk so I wouldn't tell anyone. Oh my god, I had to walk up that huge hill to get back to my house and just like stop it and hindsight Okay, we saw those road runner things no like the difference between road runners and trail runners.
Amber: 32:48
Oh yeah, I'm gonna hike this hill. I'm going to spend two, eight minutes at this age they seem eating pickles and watermelon because that sounds delicious.
Jess: 32:55
Trail running is just so is so different. I've had a few runners in the last year. A few of my athletes transition in from road to trail and never want to go back doing their first trail race and they're like there's real food at aid stations. People walk up the hills like what is this craziness? Or when we're like training for the race, and they're like, well, you know when I'm gonna eat on this this run, like I'm gonna need 37 goo gels and I'm like let's talk about some real food options, not actually 37, but you know what I mean. Yeah, I know what you mean and I'm like, trust me, gummy candy is gold. Like let's play around with these things and get curious. But oh my gosh, yeah, you transition over and you're like it can be fun, although I've still never been able to eat pretzels like the pretzels are. Is it aid stations on trail races too dry?
Amber: 33:44
I'm like, no, I'll just take the pickles things.
Jess: 33:46
Mm-hmm, we have the same sodium it is wild how good pickles and pickle juice pickle juice, yes, on long runs oh my god. Anyways, okay, I would go out a tangent about how much you live trail running for the simple fact that, like you get to eat candy and PB and J's and like cold pizza and flat coke and you're like this is the life. I think one other piece to wrap up, just talking about new runners and building that physical, mental resilience piece is keep showing up, keep getting curious. That's the biggest thing that I feel like. When I asked you like what do you say to your clients all the time? That is something that I say to my clients whether they're newer, been with me for years is be curious, stay curious. One of my clients we just started reincorporating speed work. We're kind of an offseason and we're going to transition fairly soon into training for a fast 10k and in the past speed work has been very structured and so this time around, like we're just starting with strides and it was like take a deep breath and just get curious. You're going to pick five times to run for 20 seconds at moderate pace and then go back down to easy pacing. There's no pacing requirements. Just get curious with your body, see what feels good, see what feels fun. Think about a little kid like racing across the field, and just use that. Get curious of what your body is capable of to be able to keep showing up for yourself, instead of letting it be something that's a box to check on your to-do list yeah, strides are the best lady in a court are to introduce with the correct instructions.
Amber: 35:08
Right, because most people see it. And then they're like, oh, I get a sprint. No, we don't have to run this.
Jess: 35:14
Okay, let's go zone five no stop it, I know right. Did you have any other thoughts along the lines of building body confidence for runners or lifters or people trying to move their bodies better? I think, trusting the process?
Amber: 35:32
pick the plan hopefully a coach. But if you pick a plan you got to be realistic about where you're at right. I feel like sometimes pick people pick those free plans that they find and it's like I'm going to do this intermediate half marathon plan like you're not an intermediate runner and you need a beginner.
Jess: 35:49
Are you running five days a week when you have them and running at all?
Amber: 35:52
yeah, so once you find a plan that's doable, just trust the process.
Jess: 35:56
I think that's the hardest part sometimes, especially when you get to longer races and wanting to see progress right away, yeah, or have things feel tangibly better when it fits your first race in a while or your first long distance run in a while. It's like it doesn't get easier very quickly and then sometimes, like one in 15 runs, you get that magical run that you're like.
Amber: 36:18
That's what I was gonna say, tap into that one yes, exactly like there's always that one. And then you gotta just remember that feeling and carry it with you yeah, otherwise, find good audiobooks, podcast music.
Jess: 36:31
Oh yeah, find those things as a way to get through.
Amber: 36:35
I listen to handmade still and I train for my 50k wow, and I'm gonna find one.
Jess: 36:40
I go for the rom-coms that are just ridiculously easy to be able to like, listen to and cheesy, yeah, completely that's probably a better decision.
Amber: 36:48
I wouldn't advise people to pick handmade still for that.
Jess: 36:53
I was. I remember last year when I was training for a half, I was running a paved bike path and I got to this really spicy scene in this rom-com and I'm like, looking around, this is okay, no one can hear this, but just geez, okay, just keep running during the run. Yeah, right, I'm like, is it warm? No, it's like 35 degrees, but I'm a little warm with this jacket on and okay, get this part. Yeah, I might need to fast forward. Okay. This actually leads me into kind of our like wrap up rapid fire questions. What is the number one book you recommended or given as a gift?
Amber: 37:24
Michelle Obama's becoming.
Jess: 37:26
I love it. And I say the audiobook because doesn't she narrate? Mm-hmm, that's fantastic, it's good. No, dad, what is your favorite kind of cookie? I'll click ship. Does it matter if it's hard or soft, or crunchy or soft in the middle, crunchy in the outsides?
Amber: 37:43
yeah, a little bit of crunch on the outside you're my kind of girl.
Jess: 37:46
That's my favorite too. What is this? Might be a giveaway. What is one activity that brings you joy and takes away attention from your body? Definitely running, but I would say lifting too okay, last question how do you take your coffee, besides in a regular mug, put into my cup holder in?
Amber: 38:04
your car? Open cup in the car always. No, it depends if I'm going to do a coffee shop, not like to get a latte with honey and cinnamon. Yum, if I'm at home. Honestly, I drink black coffee more often than not.
Jess: 38:19
Sometimes I'll put a little creamer in there honey and cinnamon sounds like such a warm combination. I like that. Oh, it's so good, it's fantastic, okay. Well, where can our audience find you and learn more about your coaching?
Amber: 38:30
Instagram at soul strength kc.
Jess: 38:33
or my website is soul strength kccom thanks so much for joining us today, for chatting about running and lifting and all things physical and mental resilience. This has been fun, thank you, thank you for having me thanks for listening. Friends, as you now are aware, we are dropping episodes on Fridays now, so we will catch you next Friday. Thanks for listening.